THE INCREDIBLE JOURNEY

My girlfriend leaves for a business trip shortly. It will be her first. I, as the voice of experience, have lots of advice to offer. See I HAVE been on a business trip before. It was to Kansas City and it was very exciting.

Given then, that I am a seasoned business traveler, I thought the rest of you might appreciate the wisdom I have to offer on this topic. It was a very educational trip and I am happy to share the lessons I learned.

First, I learned that Kansas really is flatter than a pancake. My boss told me this as we were driving from the airport to the hotel. Apparently someone did a study on this. Other friends, actual former residents of Kansas, have since confirmed this as fact. So my first bit of wisdom is this: pay attention and you'll pick up some fun facts about the place you are visiting.

Next wisdom: do not be surprised by your rental car. I don't care what the reservation was for or who made it, the rental companies will get it wrong, because they don't care either. In our case, they got things so wrong we ended up with an Aztec. Curiously enough Aztecs have popped up in conversation at school several times recently. Specifically, several different professors and one visiting speaker have, independent of each other, all referred to them as examples of terrible design failures. Having ridden in one, I understand why. So - lesson two - avoid Aztecs if possible and do not be surprised if it is not possible.

Third, you get your own room. This was awesome, although the learning process was a bit embarrassing. My boss got his key and I started to follow him. Two of us, two beds in a room, it was an easy mistake to make. You have to realize I was pretty fresh out of college. When college students go on a trip, anyone with less than six people in a room is either being spoiled by Mommy and Daddy or they're not using their floor space properly. Coming from that tradition, two people in a two bed room was a luxury. My boss, however, was not from that tradition, at least not recently. He was a little weirded out, just a little, and explained that I got my own room. The girl behind the counter was amused. Lesson three: do not apply a college mentality to a business trip, they're different worlds.

Finally, if possible, choose Double Tree. They give you a chocolate chip cookie when you check in. Glorious. I got my own room AND a cookie. It was a good trip (well besides the Aztec).

Here's hoping my girlfriend gets as much out of her trip as I got from mine.

WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

The Wii (pronounced "wee") from Nintendo arrived in stores this weekend, and I do not own one. I thought about it, and if I still had a salary I'm sure I would, but money is an issue, and there's a lot of hype to wade through before we find out what this thing can really do, so I'm holding off. Eventually, probably, just not now. We'll see what develops.

In the meantime, it's probably about time I finally talk to YOU about this device. I have mentioned it a number of times, always promising to devote an entry to it later. Well, this is that entry. [Those of you who do not play videogames, stick with me, this might be interesting to you, too. Maybe. Nintendo certainly hopes so.]

What is the Wii and why am I excited about it?

The Wii is Nintendo's newest video game console. As they would have it, however, it's a console for everyone, not just gamers. The Wii brings something new to gaming, a control system centered around motion-sensing. They've done other things as well, such as introducing a revamped "channel" interaction system (get the weather every morning from your Wii), providing connectivity for wireless networks, and offering every previous Nintendo game as downloadable content. That's all nice (well more than nice, even if the wifi option shows little signs of any actual application in the games themselves yet), but the Big Deal is the motion-controller - known as the Wiimote.

There is a concept in gaming, and I'm including other types of gaming besides the electronic, known as "Orthogonal Unit Differentiation" (I'm stealing most of this paragraph, to a greater or lesser degree from a powerpoint presentation by Harvey Smith of Ion Storm). It refers to the creation of game units with different functions or abilities along entirely different "orthogonal" axes. This means the abilities are not just different but non-stackable so that no amount of Unit A will ever be able to compensate for a lack in Unit B. Imagine three games units - a Soldier, a Big Soldier, and a Boat. The Soldier does 4 damage to enemy units. The Big Soldier does 8 damage to enemy units, and the Boat enables other units to cross water terrain. Two Soldiers can replace one Big Soldier, but no amount of Soldiers will ever reproduce the abilities of the Boat, and no amount of Boats will ever be able to reproduce the abilities of the Soldiers. Thus Boat and Soldier are orthogonal. The Soldier and the Big Soldier are not.

Why am I telling you this? Well, it turns out that this concept has application outside of games. It's actually a pretty useful design concept in general and in this discussion applies to the consoles themselves instead of the games they run.

The last company to introduce what I consider to be an orthogonal development, an additional ability that grants players access to something new instead of simply improving what already exists, was Microsoft with their "Xbox Live" online service. This time it's Nintendo. To see what I mean first look at the other consoles. The Playstation 3 came out last week as well. It represents a significant jump forward in graphics capability, data storage, and processing speed over the Playstation 2. The Xbox 360 (which came out around this time last year) is also a large leap forward in graphics, data storage, and processing speed over the original Xbox, and includes some additional features and options for the Xbox Live service. Both of these consoles are taking steps along existing axes, and the biggest steps (or in Sony's case, only steps) are along the processing power axis. These two consoles are competing head to head, and they have determined that this is the arena and these are the measurements which define victory. They're going from Soldier to Big Soldier. Nintendo seems to have shrugged, and said "Well, that's nice, but what about Boats?" The Wii barely surpasses the Gamecube (Nintendo's previous console) in processing power, but Nintendo has decided to proceed along a different axis, specifically, the controls.

The Xbox controls and the PS3 controls haven't changed much in several generations. They are, and always have been, buttons and joysticks. There have been minor modifications (more buttons, a vibration feature, a more ergonomic grip) but no significant differences. The Wiimote does something new. It detects and responds to motions in three axes - up/down, left/right, and forward/back. This means making a swatting motion with the controller to play a tennis game, thrusting to stab an enemy with a sword, or pointing to aim a gun. That's a very new experience. It's also (hopefully) much more intuitive than the current buttons and joysticks arrangement. Nintendo has stepped away from the powergamer and is hoping to woo the non-gamers, those people who haven't played games because they simply do not enjoy them. No amount of improved graphics is going to draw in such a person, but a new way to play just might.

We'll see if it does. As I said, Nintendo has introduced a number of other refinements and most of them seem aimed at distancing themselves from the "traditional" console approach. I'm very interested to see how this turns out. I'm also very interested to play a swordfighting game where I actually get to swing a sword.

IS THERE ANYTHING THE INTERNET CAN'T DO?

When I set out to write this post, it was going to be about "social networking" but in researching the topic a little, I found a more precise word for the concept I wanted to talk about. The new word is "folksonomy."

A folskonomy is a system of naming wherein the names are determined by the collective effort of the participants during the act of participation as opposed to a taxonomy wheren the names are externally defined and applied (and also static).

Actually what I really wanted to talk about was cool websites. My attempt to describe them under a term of some sort is merely an effort to make myself seem scholarly. It might have worked if I stuck with "social networking." "Folksonomy" on the other hand does not sound like a real word. Wikipedia seems to think it is, so I'm going to run with it.

To get to the point, though (finally): tagging systems. I'm talking today about websites where you tag content and then interact with the tags and the tags of others to try to take advantage of the processing power of large groups. The idea is that each user makes a list (and the type of thing such as movie, photograph, webpage, or book is generally determined by the website) and applies a variety of tags or labels to each item on that list. The user makes up their own tags and their own classification system and can apply as many tags as they want to each item. For instance one user could list the movie "Starship Troopers" and then tag it with "Science Fiction," "Heinlein," "War" and maybe "Stupid" but another user might tag it "10," "Action," "IOwnThis," and "FuturisticShowerScene." It's up to the user to decide what they want to track (ownership, genre, quality, etc...) and how they want to track things (quality is "stupid" through "awesome" or "1" through "10").

So these tagging systems are pretty useful for individuals attempting to classify and track things around them. Where they get their true power, however, is in the social aspect. The system on which these tags are stored is capable of analyzing and comparing the tags and feeding that information back to the user. It acts on the assumption that people who think alike will probably categorize alike. There are two means of sorting and some sites use one, some use the other, and some use both. The first is to sort by content, by how much the entered content overlaps between users; the idea being that if you and I own most of the same books, then I might also want to own the ones you own that are not on my list and vice versa (this is how Netflix and Amazon run their recommendation systems). The second is to sort by tags, by how similar users are in their labeling process (this is how most of the links below work) so that if I have a tag for "CasperVanDiem" then I might want to see what other people have tagged as "CasperVanDiem." Combining these two means of sorting lends even more power.

The trick, of course, is that you need to have a large user base for this to work. If only six people use the tagging service, the sample size won't be big enough for any really useful comparisons. It's the sort of thing that really couldn't happen without the Internet and it's part of a growing trend that takes advantage of social knowledge generally referred to as Web 2.0 (check that one out, too, sometime).

So what led me to this topic? These two websites:

del.icio.us
www.librarything.com

Del.icio.us is a means of collecting and tagging web links. It sounds really simple, but can be exceptionally useful. I have a list set up that serves as both a means of making my bookmarks portable, and a means of recording reference locations for future use. I do not really use the social aspect of del.icio.us, but I'm starting to. For instance, Adobe has a del.icio.us page with tons of really useful design links.

LibraryThing is a database for organizing books. I use it to catalog my own books (although I'm barely halfway done at this point) but it is also useful for figuring out what else I want to read. If you enjoy or own tons of books (Meredith and Brantley I'm talking to you) you will find this very useful.

And there are plenty of others such as MovieTally, which is the same as LibraryThing but for movies, although I have not yet attempted to use it. One of those things I'll get around to eventually...

Check them out, you may find them useful too.

I have not posted a post in some time. This much is obvious. I have grand plans to fix all this, but as usual, am not following through. Fortunately, Mr Fancysocks is here to pick up the slack for me. Well, not here... here. He calls it "Everything in this Blog is Completely True!!!" which aside from the confusing use of the factorial symbol, is an excellent example of what we in the writing industry like to call "sarcasm." Also "lies." Fortunately, they are entertaining lies, and in the end, isn't that the real truth? The answer, is no. Also, I'm not going to apologize for ripping off the Simpsons in that last quote, I mean if they apologized for everyone they upset, they'd have no more time for writing shows. So they're not getting my apology.

Mr. Fancysocks, aka Kenrochet, aka Penrock, aka Mike (and sometimes Michael) is doing a brave thing attempting to make the internet entertaining once more. I suggest you check his posts. Especially if you like New Kids On The Block.

In the meantime, that's one more incentive for me to return to the limelight. I'll see what I can do.

MY FAVORITE PASTTIME: CATCHING UP

At this point, and to keep my New Year's Resolution, I owe you (and myself) roughly twelve entries that I've missed and seven more before the year ends. That's a lot of writing. Fortunately I like writing. Unfortunately, I'm not very good at the starting part. I'll work on that.

This one does not count. Nor does my attempt to pimp Penrock's new blog.

To avoid confusion, I'm going to post them without modifying the date, but (for my own tracking purposes) I'll identify where they would have gone had I actually been meeting my goals. Most of them will arrive in mid-December, I'll warn you now. That's when classes end so that's when I expect to have more time of my own.

That's all.
We now return you to your regularly scheduled blog (such as it is).

ATLANTA: THE NEW DC

I'm here now. I have exchanged one city for another. The truck is unloaded, although the boxes are not yet unpacked. I am beginning the process of settling in. Beginning. It will be a while before I feel like this is my space, but I am, at least, occupying it.

The purpose of my being here aside, this is in general a positive step - at least as far as the trappings go. Every change is a tradeoff and there are things I will miss about DC (people yes, absolutely, but that goes without saying, I'm talking about the cities themselves in this post) and there are things I will not miss. Atlanta is an improvement in a few areas that most Atlanteans, I find, would not consider an improvement.

Take, for instance, the traffic. Atlanta has horrible traffic, the fourth worst in the nation according to a recent study. But it is not as bad as DC. DC is third. So I made a step in the right direction there. No one here believes me when I try to tell them that I actually find this traffic to be an improvement, but it's nice. I like it. I'm reminded of a story about a farmer who thought his family was too loud and asked a wiseman to help him. The wiseman tells the farmer to bring his cats into the house. When that makes things worse, the farmer complains and the wiseman tells the farmer to bring the dogs into the house, then the chickens, then the horse, then the cow. Finally the farmer gets fed up with this "advice" and begins to put the animals back where they belong. By the time he's done, his house, filled only with his family, seems silent. Well, applying that to my traffic situation, moving from DC to Atlanta is the equivalent of getting rid of that first cow. It's not a big step, but it is a step in the right direction.

The prices here are another nice jump, although this one is a bit more significant. Atlanta does not cost nearly as much as DC. If I were not attempting to live on a grad-student budget, I could even consider buying a house. Not so in DC, it would be hard to find a studio apartment near DC for less than the houses around here.

It's not all positive (tradeoffs, remember), but in general my everyday life has gotten just a little bit easier. Well, the trappings at least. We'll see what gradschool itself does to my stress levels...

GOOD FRIENDS HELP YOU MOVE, GREAT FRIENDS HELP YOU MOVE BODIES

I should be talking about my move. This is the weekend it went down, after all, and while this post is being written well after the date it's filling, the events of this weekend are still fresh enough and significant enough that I should have a lot to say. And I do, I just don't want to.

This move covered greater distance and more unknowns (physically, mentally, emotionally, academically, ecumenically...) than any previous move and with that came greater stress. So I don't really want to talk about the move.

I want to talk about the movers.

I owe (and am using this forum to provide) a big thanks to the people who helped me move.

I did wine and dine them for their efforts (well "beer and pizza them" would be more accurate, if less poetic) but regardless, thanks are in order.

So thanks.
Thanks a lot.
You guys made a difficult event much easier and your presence (whether you realized it or not) helped me stay in touch with reality long enough to see the job through.

Mike and Sarah (who had already provided most of the boxes), Melissa, Bruce, and Alex helped with the loading (and I have my share of heavy furniture plus more than my share books so it was certainly not an easy process) and, in more cases than should have been necessary, they helped finish up the packing as well. I "supervised" and they handled most of the actual arrangement within the truck. In the roughly thirteen hours that truck spent on the road, only one item was damaged and I did that closing the rear gate before we had even left DC.

Bruce and Bonnie both helped out on days they had to work. In Bruce's case, he lifted heavy objects then went to work (and was the last person to use my shower in that apartment - for whatever that's worth). In Bonnie's case, she had to work a full day first, then showed up later. She arrived after the bulk of boxes had been loaded, but made up for missing the grunt work by providing several goodies for the tired crew.

At the other end of the trip, the Pennocks helped unload everything. This was after they helped me find the apartment in the first place, and after they put us up for the night at their place before I could actually move into the new apartment.

And of course, I have to thank my Sarah. Before the move she helped pack the boxes, including but not limited to almost my entire kitchen. That the plates survived the trip is her doing, and also her influence that the rest of my small stuff did, too (she's the one who convinced me to use the packing paper supplied by Mike and the other Sarah). She helped throughout the day of the move, and then drove my car while I drove the truck. It took us thirteen hours through varying levels of traffic, and the next day she helped unload the truck. Then she stayed four more days to help me unpack, find my way around the new campus, and just begin the process of settling in. Several times she found me just staring at things, unable to decide what to do next, a little shell shocked and she prodded me out of it.

Without the assistance of so many (and I'm including here the support and well wishes of the people who could not be present for whatever reason to provide physical assistance), this would have been a much more difficult transition. I appreciate everything you all did to make this easier for me.

Thank you.

UP AND AT EM

When you need to stay awake, how do you do it? For me it depends on what I am trying to do. If I am just preparing myself for future nights (getting ready for my midnight shift), the single best way to keep myself up is to play a videogame. It keeps me engaged more than a book or movie would because I have to constantly make decisions and react. I don't claim I play very well when I'm forcing myself to stay up, but at least I'm awake.

But what about those times when you need to stay awake for a specific task, not just for the sake of staying awake? Sitting at work at the end of a long week, trying to survive a meeting after a heavy lunch, or driving somewhere late at night...

I do not drink coffee, so that's out. Fortunately at work I can get up and walk around, shake myself a little. On the midnight shift, some of us do pushups every hour to keep ourselves alert (and fit). You can't do that in meetings, though, and I have real trouble with those, especially in the early afternoon. This has been true for a long time. I fell asleep in every early afternoon class I had in college, no matter how fascinating. I never did find an adequate solution. Part of the problem is that there is a point in the struggle against sleep where you lose your ability to discern whether you are losing that battle and why winning it is even important.

I once got into an argument about this with a gryphon and a dragon. The gryphon thought I was asleep, the dragon was not so sure. In hindsight, considering that gryphons and dragons did not usually attend my CS class, I think maybe the gryphon was right. That was, if I remember correctly, the day I decided I would be better off napping during that hour and just reading the book. I could do this since the professor wrote the book and tended to take his slides directly from its pages. I didn't miss much.

That was a harmless occasion. The time I slowed down to let a dinosaur cross route 29 ended up being harmless because I was the only person on the road at that time, but the potential consequences were much more dire. When I woke up enough to realize just how dangerous that drive had been, I was appalled (and still am, I was *really* lucky). I also changed my driving habits and identified a series of cues that can help me tell if I'm falling asleep. Threshold events are key if you're going to be doing most of your judging in a sleep impaired state. Mythical and extinct creatures are a big one, although they're pretty far down the list. If I've made it to that point, I've already missed too many signs. My friend Bruce uses the "one eye test:" If he ever finds himself closing one eye so half of his body can get some sleep while the other half drives, he pulls over immediately.

A list of sleep criteria is good, but it still fails the meeting test. Namely because the solution when driving, to pull over and rest or walk around a bit and refresh yourself, does not work so well in meetings or classes. The boss looks at you funny if you start doing jumping jacks during her presentation.

So, dear readers, how do you do it? What methods do you use to discretely wake up and stay awake during meetings and presentations? Tired minds want to know.

Our hero continues his impressions of his trip west...

THE FLIP FLOP PHENOMENON

My first conscious observation of this phenomenon occurred on top of Mount Washington in New Hampshire. Mount Washington is the tallest mountain in the northeast - home to some of the worst weather in North America (including the highest wind gust ever recorded on Earth). It is also home to, among other things, a railroad, a road, and a gift shop (the buildings are literally chained to the ground using battleship chains - see previous comment regarding wind gusts).

It is difficult to describe the feeling one gets after walking for miles, ascending several thousand feet from the valley floor while carrying a 35 pound pack and finding at the top of the mountain people wearing flip flops, jeans, sun-visors, and deoderant. Also some of them carry purses, small children, and/or gameboys. There's a reason thru-hikers moon the Cog Railroad that helps bring these people to the top, and it's not just the smoke or the whistle (both of which carry for miles).

Yosemite Valley suffers a similar fate, although the feeling is muted somewhat by the fact that Yosemite is so large that we had to drive ourselves (it's hard to get indignant about others when you yourself have just stepped from an air conditioned vehicle). It certainly felt crowded, though, especially after the relative solitude of the Ansel Adams Wilderness.

It's a little more difficult to get frustrated with the tourists in Yosemite than the ones on top of Mount Washington. Some of them, yes, it's easy to get irritated with the ones who leave hot dogs in their cars and then act surprised when the bears pry the doors off. Many of Yosemite's visitors, however, do have to camp while they're there, or at least fake it with RV's. Also, Yosemite is just so beautiful you WANT other people to see it so they'll begin to understand why wilderness conservation is so important. This is the place, after all, that inspired the whole concept (thank you John Muir and Abraham Lincoln). So I don't really mind the flip-flops there. Besides, you can't get to the REALLY cool places in flip flops anyway.

PHOTOGRAPHY

It is virtually impossible to take an ugly picture in Yosemite. Tourists serve as the only real threat to aesthetic and they'd have to be pretty darn ugly to mess it up. On the other hand, it is also very difficult to take a satisfying picture - one that captures a true feel of "being there." Ansel Adams came close but even he could not adequately reproduce in two dimensions the impact of this place.

I am no Ansel Adams, nor, for that matter, was I using Ansel Adam's camera. I do, however, have some nice pictures (I took 173, it's hard NOT to end up with at least one or two decent ones that way). If you're interested in seeing any of them, let me know and I'll share what I've got. (I'll also try to actually post one or two in the midst of these columns once I get home to upload them - considering how long it took me to get this entry up, though, you probably should not hold your breath).

ECHOES

My Dad, my brother, my uncle, and I all seem to think alike. We tended to spread out as we traveled (thinking alike is one thing, moving alike is something else) and many times over the course of our journey, one pair (usually my brother and my uncle were in the lead) would pass something interesting and comment on it, only to hear the pair behind them make the same comment a few minutes later. Part of that is family, and part is the essence of the place (ask nicely sometime and I'll tell you what I mean by THAT, but not here).

Also, when it came time to get souvenirs, we all bought the same shirt. That actually might be less a comment on the similarity of our taste and more an indication of the similarity of our financial outlook. That particular shirt was the cheapest shirt in the store. It was also one of the cooler shirts, so maybe it was taste. It was probably both.

Regardless of the reason, three of us ended up with the shirt independently and the fourth got it after seeing what one of the others had chosen. We were so amused that we decided to play "tourist family" and all wore the shirt on our last day. It was partly for our own amusement, but mostly an attempt to embarass my cousin. We showed up at her door wearing them and bearing one for her, too.

OVERALL

A fantastic trip. I heartily recommend all of it. Even if you don't like hiking, you will find much to enjoy and appreciate in Yosemite Valley. If you do like hiking, definitely visit the valley, but also make sure you get out and away from it at some point, too. You will not regret the trip.

Yay, new posts! I'm not providing the excuses, just the new posts... backdated - so you know even MORE new posts are on the way (and, at least in the case of this post and the two that follow, the dates are accurate, they really were written when I say they were, just not posted until now)

THE WILDERNESS

For some time now I have not been within reach of "the internet." Nor have I been within reach of "electricity" or even "mattresses." I have, however, been within reach of bears. Fortunately they were kind enough not to exercise that option. The mosquitoes were not so considerate.

To clarify, I spent last week in the Sierra Nevadas. More specifically I spent several days in the Ansel Adams Wilderness (no tourists) and several days in and around Yosemite Valley (tourists) with my Dad, brother, and uncle. My cousin was supposed to join us, but she ran out of vacation and has heartless bosses (marketing, if you must know) so she had to be left behind. There probably would have been fewer fart jokes if she had been along, but maybe not. In any case, we missed having her there, but she made up for it by giving us a tour of San Francisco at the end of the trip.

It was a busy week and any one activity would take more words (than you would care to read) for me to even begin to describe. So I'll do the half-assed version: provide you with a series of impressions and admit right out that anything I can say will be inadequate to capture the experience. As these impressions continue to process, I may find that one or more of them require their own entry (and indeed getting them all out is going to require two entries in and of themselves). Until I do decide such a thing, however, you're going to have to settle for just the impressions. Let us begin...

SAN FRANCISCO

As this was my point of arrival and as we almost immediately went for a walk to Haight-Ashbury, this is my first impression. It's combined somewhat with my final impression since my cousin took us on a driving tour as my final activity before I flew home.

San Francisco is a unique city. I do not think it could ever be mistaken for any other city. Consider a game (for really bored rich people) where you blindfold a person, spin them three times, drop them into a random city anywehere in the world and then make them guess where they are. They'll get San Francisco right on the first try every time. Admittedly, my perspective may be skewed considering the first place I saw in SF was Haight-Ashbury, but that impression was not contradicted by anything I saw in my later tour. It's partly the hills, partly the architecture, but it's mostly the people. They're fascinating - many of them very attractive, but attractive in the unconventional sense, by which I mean tattoos and piercings, also hair colors usually reserved for Kool-aid, and some astounding (to me) fashion decisions. Of course, some of them could have stood to shower more often...

THE SIERRA NEVADAS

We spent most of our trip above 7000 feet. So when it was 104 degrees in the valley, we were experiencing a comfortable 70 degrees. As we drove higher, we turned off the air conditioning and opened the windows. The Sierra Nevadas even SMELL amazing. It wasn't my first sign that these mountains are not the Appalachians, but it was one of the most compelling. (Just to be clear, I love the east coast mountains. Nothing I say here should lead you to believe otherwise). Before catching that scent I think I had been imagining these mountains as simply bigger versions of the Appalachians. Not so. It's a different world on the west coast. The trees, the views, the rocks, even the trail we walked upon, all had a different flavor than anything I had experienced before.

There's a good deal less undergrowth and a lot more "tree trash" on the ground - dead branches, fallen trees, loose bark, more dead branches. Nothing seems to rot there, it burns (this is a good thing, fire serves as a crucial component of the ecology).

There seems to be less top soil, or at least poorer top soil, no rich loam. The trails were either dusty (sandy in some places) or muddy with no middle ground. Also, it felt odd to me that most of the trails we covered were actually trails. In the White Mountains, by contrast, when you're not stepping on rocks you're stepping on roots. And when you're out of the trees entirely, you feel like you're standing on one big pile of rocks (which, at the age of the Appalachians, is basically the case). When you clear the trees in the Sierra Nevada, you're standing on ONE rock - otherwise known as the mountain.

YOSEMITE VALLEY

In a word: awesome - in the contemporary sense (wicked rad and totally cool) but even more so in the classic sense (inspiring awe, humility, and a sense of your own insignificance that can sometimes be confused with fear). Other words that could be applied include: beautiful, amazing, fascinating, gorgeous, breath-taking, stunning, inspiring, magnificent, majestic, and indescribable. Also: tourists.

- but more on that next week -

STUFF!

In preparation for my move to Atlanta, I have begun cleaning out my apartment. I do not mean the dirt-removal kind of cleaning - in that sense, my apartment is already pretty clean - I mean the clutter-removal kind, getting rid of whatever I do not need to take with me.

This is a daunting task for two reasons:
a) I'm something of a pack rat
b) I have not actually made any kind of concentrated effort to "unclutter myself since I left college, and even then I did not do a very good job.

Neither of those reasons should come as much of a surprise to you. After all, you have probably read about the ranch dressing incident, wherein our hero bravely carried an unopened bottle of ranch dressing through three moves over three and a half years, never dreaming of the darkness that lurked within. Well, friends, I have looked into that darkness, and wept for what it revealed. Since that horrible day, I have practice caution when peering into my refridgerator or foraging through my cabinets. My kitchen is a much safer place than it used to be.

But what of my bedroom, my living room, or my coat closet? In those dark dens lurk ancient things and I, who would scour them, have no expiration dates to guide me. Until now I have left these mysterious objects to molder quietly in the darkness or, as the case may be, in piles upon my bedroom floor.

Well this week that changed. I took the first steps in to identify and remove that which I no longer need, which would only weigh me down, wasting both the strength and the space I would need to move them to yet another aparment.

And that first step was to make a list. After all, I like lists. I called it "The Great Clean" and upon this list I wrote the names of every major container of stuff I need to go through: Dresser, Desk, File Cabinet, Space Under The Bed, and so forth. I then identified subcategories which were, in most cases, drawers.

First on the list is my filing cabinet. Second is Bedroom Floor. It would be first, but since most of it is going to end up in the filing cabinet, I figured I'd better start there first.

It is an interesting process, this uncluttering. As I said above, I am something of a pack rat, and what I keep (everything) I keep for a long time (indefinitely - well, until this week at least). I shredded my first bank statement about four days ago. I don't mean "first bank statement to be shredded this week" (although it is that, too), I mean the first bank statement I ever received in my own name. It was nine and a half years old.

I certainly don't need that anymore, or the pay stubs for my college job, or the manual for the iron that I lost two years ago, or the three copies of my first resume. I have been getting my money's worth out of my shredder this week. I have also lightened my moving load quite a bit (assuming I don't convince myself I should bring the shreddings with me...).

That's just the paper, the bottom drawer of the file cabinet. There are two other drawers and they contain stranger things. Things I do not need, like the two empty altoid containers I swore I'd find a use for someday, the water color paints originally purchased for my college drama class (which have made the transition from "paint" to "paperweight" sometime in the two years since I last opened them), or the bottle holder that's supposed to be on my bike (actually I am keeping that - I just, you know, attached it to my bike).

Besudes space and weight, I may also be saving myself some money. I found three half opened packages of batteries. Hopefully I will remember where they are the next time I need batteries and will save myself from creating a fourth half opened package. I also found two half-used rolls of tape, an unopened package of post-it notes, and four pins from my pin collection that I had thought lost or had forgotten entirely. That's a lot I do not have to buy, replace, or in the case of the tape and the batteries, buy again.

I really should do this more often.

POWER STRUGGLE

I lost power last week. Then I got it back, sort of. I got power back to my living room and my kitchen, but not to my bedroom or my bathroom. I thought it was an issue with fuses somewhere in the building. Nope. It was a problem with the power lines coming into the building. This is trange to me because it means my apartment receives its power from two different external sources. Why would you wire an apartment like that? I understand the need for multiple sources for the building, but for my individual apartment?

One theory, the one that is most flattering to the builders, suggests that wiring an apartment to two different power sources means the renter won't lose all power unless both sources are interrupted. But then again, it also means that the renter is guaranteed to lose at least some power every time either source is affected. The situation reminds me of a question my high school boss once asked my brother: If the neighborhood kids are playing baseball, and you are worried that they might break your window, do you open the window, or close it? The answer doesn't matter: if you open the window, you reduce the chance that it will be struck by the ball by half, but double the damage a hit would cause.

In any case, I don't think that's what the builders were doing. I think they just didn't think about it. That would certainly fit the general trend of apparent carelessness.

I like my apartment. It's just the right size for me, in a decent location, and has plenty of parking. However, the general construction and maintenance leaves a little to be desired. For starters, there's basic maintenance carelessness, such as paint on all the hinges, light switches, and electrical outlets (all of which is very easy to avoid). It's been my experience that this is fairly common in apartments, but knowing that does not make it any less disappointing.

Besides the maintenance concerns, however, there's also the matter of the rather strange wiring decisions. For instance, the wiring in the bathroom baffles me. There are two outlets in the bathroom - one attached to the light switch, and one attached to the light. The outlet next to the switch is at the right location for a night light, but not for anything else, not without running an electrical cord across the toilet at any rate. The outlet attached to the light is directly above the sink and so could be used for charging my electric shaver or, if I were so inclined, running a hair dryer or curlers. It is also a pretty good spot for a night light. The problem is this: they are both activated by the light switch. That pretty much eliminates the whole night light idea - and thus any reason to use the outlet next to the switch. It also means I have to leave the bathroom light on if I want to charge my shaver. I'd rather not waste the electricity, so I plug the shaver into the dining room outlet. Since I'm not much for hair dryers or curlers, I haven't used either of the bathroom outlets since I moved in (although there are certainly times I would have appreciated the night light).

Another frustration, I have no real control over my heater or AC. Oh, there's a thermostat, but that just controls a blower. That's useful enough in the summer. In the winter, however, my apartment tends to stay in the eighties with the blowers off and there's nothing I can do about it, besides open the windows. I thought I'd left that behind with college dorms. Oh well.

As I said, I like my apartment, but I'm starting to look forward to a change. I think I'll be getting out of here at just the right time. I'm taking notes on all the little things that bug me about it so I can keep an eye out for them when I go apartment searching in Atlanta.

P.S. Apparently there is yet a third power source for the building that remains unfixed - it is the supply for the air conditioner chiller. Ugh. Yup, looking forward to a new place.

LESSONS LEARNED

They say you learn something new every day. It's true. I know. I made a list. Perhaps I was seeking the truth. Perhaps I was just bored. In either case, here are some of the things I have learned in the past few days:

- I do not like parsnips.
- I do not like lamb.
- Cooking with someone else is fun, no matter how the food turns out (actually, I knew this one already).
- Good intentions aren't any more effective than they used to be (that's one of those lessons that needs constant reinforcement for me).
- It IS possible (with a little effort) to buy a card after the holiday has passed.
- I grind my teeth when I'm stressed.
- I really do remember how to make a gant chart.
- My coworker Steve cannot do pushups while Tom is making fart noises.
- Running out of wiper fluid while trying to use it is worse than not having any at all.
- Do not buy donuts after 9PM if you can help it.
- "Sometime soon" is not an acceptable schedule. Be specific or it won't happen.
- I cannot walk into a bookstore without buying something.
- Bob and Jim do not see eye to eye on the "ground under repair" rule in golf. Also, this is a subject that can occupy them for a good hour and a half.
- If you cut your hair, people will finally notice that you shaved your beard.
- A single serving of orange juice will always cost more than you think it should.
- If you cannot come up with a good blog idea, make a list.

P.S. For those of you who enjoy lists - here are two people who have mastered the art of the list: Homestarrunner and David Ives (see the introduction to his collection of plays: All in the Timing)

STAR WARS WARS

We have already established that I am a dork. Part of what that usually entails is an avid love of Star Wars and this is certainly the case for me. I should clarify, however. I love the original Star Wars movies. I love the universe in which they're set, and much of the lore that has been developed for that universe. I love Episode III and tolerate Episodes I and II (while loving the fight scenes found therein). I do not, however, love the remakes of the originals. I would go so far as to say I dislike, perhaps even disdain the remakes.

Honestly, that may have more to do with the historical context of the originals in my life than any real difference in quality. How would I feel if I had seen the remakes first? Hard to say. In any case, I didn't. I saw the originals first. I grew up with them. So naturally I'm inclined to prefer them.

Those of you who follow geek news know where I'm going with this. For the rest of you, here are the relevant facts (with my opinion strewn about liberally amongst them).

George Lucas, the creator of Star Wars, has claimed that the remakes are what he intended all along. When the state of the art in filmmaking caught up to his original vision, he finished off what he had started. In his mind, then (and this theory leaves out various cynical marketing considerations) the remakes ARE the movies while the originals are merely a poor first draft. With this in mind, he has steadfastly refused for years to release the original version on DVD (with the deterioration of VHS and laserdiscs, this means that viewable copies of the originals are slowly vanishing and would not be replaced). He vowed he never would, much to the disappointment of the hardcore fans.

These are the people who drove the juggernaut of demand that kept the license alive and flourishing, that allowed Lucas to create the remakes and the prequels in the first place. Their discontent with the remakes is not malice, it's the result of loving a thing for fifteen years. We're talking about CHERISHED movies. What Lucas has been doing (and the geeks are not going to like this analogy) is like taking a favored stuff animal away from a child and telling them they must play with the new one. The new one is just not the same. This isn't the velveteen rabbit, we're not talking about the scarlet fever here. There's no reason "for our own good" to have to take this cherished thing away from us. So, for years many of the fans have been crying out for Lucas to make the originals available.

Now, finally, George Lucas has agreed to release the originals on DVD. Yay, right? Well, not really. See, he hasn't really changed his position on the situation. He does not care for the originals, does not want them out there, and is not putting much effort into doing so. he claims to have "taped over" the original masters (he cut them up in the process of creating the remakes). Therefore, to make this DVD release, he is essentially copying over the laserdisc version. It's not going to be cleaned up, it's not going to be surround sound (which is odd, because the originals were). It's not going to be anamorphic widescreen (which means more to people who own or plan to own a widescreen TV than the rest of us). And, most insulting of all, it's not going to be available without strings - namely an attached copy of the remakes.

That's right - the originals can ONLY be purchased in a bundled pack with the remakes (this setup is actually described as a remake DVD with "bonus material" on the official announcement). This is odd when you consider two things: those of us who WANT the remakes already have them. Those of us who don't want the remakes, you know, don't want the remakes. So by releasing the originals only in a boxed set, Lucas is punishing the loyal fans who support the remakes by making them purchase them again, and he's pissing off the people who are already irritated by making them purchase the very movies that irritated them in the first place.

It's a good deal less odd when you consider two other forces: marketing and ego. In terms of marketing, Lucas has found a way to sell people something they either don't need or don't want. In other words, he has found a way to sell something that would not sell otherwise. From an ego standpoint (and because I fall into the irritated column, I'm going with this as my prime thesis), George Lucas has found a way to keep the "old" version from ever outselling his precious "new" version. Or, in a twist on the same premise, he has found a way to sabotage the sales of the originals and thus "prove" that nobody really wanted them in the first place.

I'm generally inclined to give people the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps too often. In this case, though, I'm having a hard time. I have a hard time believing he could not find a higher quality source, that he could not provide appropriate sound (this is not even the THX remastered sound that came out on VHS), that cleaning up the image would be terribly difficult (one columnist pointed to the recent OZ rerelease as an example of what could be done on that front). And I really can't believe, even for marketing reasons, that it is really necessary to bundle the originals with the remakes. Maybe George Lucas honestly does not understand the desire for the originals (bonus materials?!?!), but this whole operation smacks too much of a stubborn ego reluctant to admit error for me to really believe that.

George Lucas may have been a force for good in this universe once, but he has fallen far. Maybe he'll change his mind. Maybe this is a stopgap measure until the next generation of media arrives (there are signs DVD is about to be surpassed) and he can do it right. Maybe his son will grow up to become a Jedi and redeem the father who has turned to the dark side. That would be nice.

EXCITING NEWS

So, uh, I've been telling people for a while that "someday I intend to go to grad school". Well, that statement has been a bit refined and clarified recently.

"Someday" can now be read as "In August" and "grad school" can be taken to mean "the Masters of Industrial Design program at Georgia Tech." Also, while we're at it, replace "intend to go to" with "have been accepted and will be attending." About the only thing that stays unchanged is "I." And honestly, it would be an error to believe that I will be unchanged when all is done. For instance, I suddenly have two months to find the housing, parking, registration, books, supplies, and money I'll need to accomplish this. That's on top of the other activities I already have planned for this summer. Busy times ahead.

Anyway, thought you'd want to know...

Oh, and P.S. if anyone wants to see the portfolio I put together for the application, let me know. It's 3 megs, so be sure your email can handle it before you ask :)

RETURN TO WITCH MOUNTAIN

This past weekend, I attended my five year college reunion.

It was a strange and interesting event. Mmy first official reunion, although it's not the first reunion to which I've been invited. That honor goes to my five year high school reunion. But that one was kind of slapped together at the last minute ("whoever is in town for Christmas, let's all meet at Senor Pancho's") and I already had my plane tickets when the "invitation" came out, so I missed it.

My five year college reunion was a little different. They had both aspirations and a budget to match. It was an Event.

They offered seminars, dinners, brunches, gatherings, dances, and so on. All this came, of course, at a price (considerably greater than, say, Senor Pancho wanted for a pitcher of margartias) but was worth it, even though I skipped out on some of the parties (and consequently missed Alex's proposal to Bonnie, which occuurred during the fireworks - congrats to them!).

I spent much of the weekend showing my girlfriend where I had my classes, where I ate lunch, how far I had to walk between one and the other. She performed a passable imitation of "someone who is not bored" and I certainly appreciate that.

I also introduced her to the various friends, acquaintances, and ne'er do wells who spiced up my college years. These people are the real reason I was there. You know... that whole "reunion" concept. I did not get to see all of the people I wanted to. The only person to show up from my first-year suite was the one person I would have bet money would NOT be there - seeing him was a pleasant surprise, but I missed the others. Fortunately, I did see plenty of other people I had been hoping for, and some I had not thought about in a long time. I was even able to catch up with several others who were in or passing through Charlottesville for other reasons (if I were to run my own personal reunion, it wouldn't be based on which year you graduated...).

Besides the people I knew I knew, I also spent a good deal of time looking around and trying to remember WHY certain other people looked familiar. Did I recognize that guy because we shared classes and projects together, or was it simply because he and I tended to have the same eating schedule and he was always about five places ahead of me in the lunch line? Did I recognize that girl because she was in the beginning karate class I helped teach, or was it simply because she sat next to the cute girl in my comm class who I asked on a date once? One answer meant that person could be approached and engaged in conversation. The other meant they would be weirded out.

I did get into a few of these conversations, the kind where we exchanged earnest updates on our lives and careers since college while one or both of us was furiously struggling to remember what, if any, association we had and when, if ever, we had spoken to each other BEFORE this reunion.

Like I said, a reunion is certainly a strange and interesting event. The atmosphere is certainly unique. There's nothing like a reunion to make everything seem both old and new, both familiar and alien, both cherished and distant - all at once. It's a strange experience and one I recommend heartily/cautiously.

THE CLOTHES MAKE THE MAN

There are perhaps four categories of t-shirts I wear. This is a change from college. During college there was really only one category: free. Well, I guess you could further subdivide that if you wanted: gifts from my parents, gifts from credit-card companies, gifts from promotional event organizers, and so on. The important point to note, however, is that I was not in control of the designs available to me. A certain cliche comes to mind regarding the ability of beggars to be selective.

Well, I have surpassed my t-shirt beggar status. I have begun to experience and enjoy my new role as chooser. It's quite fun.

So now my t-shirts fall into four categories:

1. Plain - These shirts are solid colors or have simple designs upon them. They're great for wearing under other shirts and are also fine alone.

2. Reminder/Souvenir - These are the shirts I get to commemorate a trip or an event (or even four years of college). It's my smallest group and the reason for that is a holdover from college habits, when these shirts were given away for free. Well, those free shirts are ratty enough now that I can't wear them in public and I have only recently decided it's alright to pay money for such things. So, like I said, it's my smallest group, but it's growing.

3. Cool - These are the shirts with a symbol or image that looks "cool" (duh). Slightly more advanced than plain, but not as entertaining as the next category. Examples of "cool" include anything that references the Thundercats or the Transformers.

4. Witty - My fastest growing collection. These shirts mostly consist of funny phrases and images or just text alone. A few, like my t-shirt t-shirt, are just images. I love these shirts, the subtler the better. I am a big fan of the subtle visual joke. Hence, my appreciation of the t-shirt t-shirt, a shirt with nothing upon it but a picture of another shirt. That shirt was a gift (one of the nicer shirts I possessed during my "free" period) but since that point I have been adding to the collection. Generally I do so with the idea of amusing others, but if I'm the only one who is amused (as sometimes happens), I'm okay with that.

A visual demonstration is perhaps in order but it will have to wait. See, I'm at the beach and this restricts my ability to upload images (you're lucky you're getting text). Also, as I am at the beach, I have better things to do. Like show off my new t-shirts.

UPDATE: I have pictures. They're not pictures of me, per se, but they are designs I now own (except the one in the middle, that one's yellow).

RACING AGAIN

Last weekend, for the first time in nine years, I ran a 5k (3.1 miles for those of you who are metrically-challenged). Considering it followed twelve miles of biking and a 250 yard swim, I didn't do too badly (the biking is the part I did quite poorly on). Okay, so it would have been more accurate, and probably quicker to say that I ran a triathlon.

Woo! Go me. And go my brother, too. It's largely his fault I was there. See, entering this triathlon was his idea; one small step in our larger campaign to make sure we are able to survive the hike we have planned with our family (one uncle, one cousin, our father, and us) later this summer. We entered it on the hope that a general fear of embarassment would drive us to exercise and to exercise hard.

Well, it partly worked. I started excercising in March. Unfortunately, I needed ANOTHER carrot to do it - the Back to the Beach Contest at work. I entered THAT so I'd work out for the triathlon so I'd be ready for the hike. Eventually enough things loaded up on top of each other that I had to work out.

And I largely stuck to it. What I did not do, however, is work out as much as I should have.
It was enough, but not enough enough.

I survived the triathlon, even prospered in parts, but I can do better. Which is why I intend to do another one, and another one after that.

I've wanted to run a triathlon for some time now. Although, to be honest, what I really think I've wanted is not necessarily to run a triathlon, but to know I could (and to be able to tell other people). Well I've demonstrated that part to my satisfaction.

I completed the entire race without stopping (except once when someone handed me a cup of water and I couldn't figure out how to drink it and keep running at the same time - something I should work on). There were 500 contestants listed (although fewer than that showed up for various reasons). I was 83rd in the swim (pretty good), 321st in the bike (ouch), and 192nd in the run portion (not bad). That ugly ugly bike portion hurt though, and I ended up 276th overall, 24th out of 26 in my age group (which is not an age-group that bothers to reward casual efforts).

So I now know I can run a triathlon. What I want to know next is, can I run one well? I think so, but I'm just going to have to do more triathlons to prove it to myself. I've learned a number of lessons including practice more, don't kill yourself in the swim (that high place came at a high price), practice more, and don't use a thirteen year old Huffy mountain bike from Kmart to compete in a road race. When I, pedaling steadily, was passed going downhill by a woman whose chain was BROKEN, I realized part of my problem might just have been the bike. Also, I need to practice more.

PLAYING WITH TIME

Predating, it’s kind of like cheating. So to make it absolutely clear that I’m not trying to fake you out, I’ll go ahead and admit right now: I’m lying about the dates on several posts. Which posts and why we’ll get to in a moment.

The why is because I screwed up. This year I’ve promised myself I’d act more and procrastinate less. Up until March, this blog was an example of my success. Unfortunately, it seems I have serious momentum issues. Once I find myself at rest I tend to stay at rest so when the snowboard trip interrupted my regular schedule, I found a large number of excuses not to return. I posted again, but sporadically, not on the original weekly schedule I had set for myself.

This is pretty disappointing to me. Some of you will tell me these delays are still shorter than many of my old ones, but this time I’m not comparing my performance to past performance, I’m comparing it to intended performance. By that measure, my current performance has been, to put it frankly, “thhbbppt.”

Well, this is the year of acting on my intentions - so I’m backfilling, making up for the missing entries. As of this writing, it has been ten weeks since the first interruption. In that time, I have provided four articles. I’m not going to worry about the vacation week because, well, it was a vacation. So I’m basically okay on entries up until the second week of April.

The way I see it, I owe you entries for April 9th, April 16th, April 30th, and May 7th - and that’s where I’m going to put them. This entry serves as the cap (and my May 14th slot). I’ll update this one as I get the others entered so you know whether to go back and look for them or not. At the same time, I’m going to keep updating to my original schedule. Fortunately, in preparation for this return to adequacy, I’ve been writing lots and the entries are basically ready. I just have to type them, so they should be up soon.

This blog is largely for me, but it’s partly for you, too, and I apologize (to both of us) for the delay in these entries.

It won’t happen again.

------

Posted so far:

April 9th: ALL IN A NAME

April 16th: OF MICE AND RABBITS

April 30th: WELL, I CARE

May 7th: COOKING OUTSIDE THE LINES

That completes the missing posts. We're back to business as normal, or what passes for normal around here.

COOKING OUTSIDE THE LINES

I enjoy cooking, most of the time. The problem is I don't really feel like I know what I'm doing. I can follow a recipe like a champ. I even do okay with some of the more complex recipes. I don't balk at concepts like roux. I have a double-boiler and I know how to use it. So I can cook, sort of.

I say "sort of" because I believe there's more to cooking than recipes. Restricting yourself to food that comes from a recipe is like restricting yourself to music that comes from a sheet. You can get some great music from a sheet, but you will miss out on whole genres like, say, jazz. There's no jazz in my cooking. To be more precise (and less metaphorical) there is no improvisation in my cooking.

I cannot adapt a recipe to my own needs, cannot make substitutions for missing ingredients, and I most certainly cannot improvise a whole meal from scratch. Take away my recipes and you take away my ability to cook.

I'm not much of a risk taker. My mom thinks it's a symptom of first-child syndrome - this unwillingness to deviate from instructions. My brother (a second child) can go through his fridge, toss whatever he finds in a pan, and produce some pretty impressive meals. I envy him that ability. My grandmother (a fourth child) makes some wonderful foods, but is completely unable to explain what she's doing. It is nearly impossible to get her to commit to quantities and times so I can create a recipe for myself to use later. Her answer to "How much parsley?" is "As much as I need." She uses recipes occasionally, but most of the time she makes food without ever opening a cookbook.

The only thing I make without a recipe is a sandwich. What keeps me from trying anything more complex is the feeling that I do not understand the rules behind cooking. I don't know why things are done the way they are. I do not know the relationship between certain spices and the final taste. I do not know when it is okay to withhold salt and when it is not okay. In short, I do not understand the chemistry behind cooking and, until I do, I'm not willing to experiment. This is where the first-child syndrome really gets me into trouble, because experimenting is one of the best ways to make up for this deficiency. It's a catch-22. I'm not willing to try new things until I understand why and I won't understand why until I try new things.

Enter Alton Brown

My girlfriend gave me Alton Brown's book "I'm Just Here For the Food" for my birthday, a most excellent gift. Now finally I have in my hands a resource that explains not just what to do but WHY we do it (he also has a TV show, but I don't happen to get that channel). He explains the theory, the chemistry, behind the actions. Give me a little while to read it, and soon I hope to take my cooking from the act of assembling food into the much more exciting realm of creating it.

I can't wait.

WELL, I CARE

E3 is happening right now, well, it’s happening as I write this [actually, the dates are wrong – for a variety of reasons, this post has been backdated]. By the time I type it up and post it, E3 will be over and done with. Its repercussions will, however, still be . . . repurcussing. That’s what it’s for, after all.

E3 is the Electronic Entertainment Expo. It’s a videogame conference, or rather THE videogame conference, much like the Oscars is THE film awards show (except E3 happens before the games come out, not after, and the self-congratulatory backpatting is referred to as “marketing” instead of “awards”). This is where “electronic entertainment” companies wave their hands in the air, make fabulous promises (that many won’t keep, but which some will exceed), and in general try to woo the hearts, minds, and wallets of the gaming community. It is a time for big announcements. This one, in particular, has been much anticipated.

See, this is a nextgen year. The major console manufacturers have just put out their product (Microsoft’s Xbox360) or intend to do so before the year is up (Sony PS3, Nintendo Wii). This E3 has been our first real glimpse (as much as anything at E3 is ever “real”) at those last two. Both Sony and Nintendo are revealing secrets, abilities, and release details. Even Xbox, which has been out since November, had some new and exciting things to talk about.

Here are a few of the announcements that interested me:

Nintend Wii –Nintendo didn’t say as much as they could have (still no price and no specific release date), but what they did say was pretty cool. Here’s a quick link to their announcement, but my discussion of it will have to wait. This console deserves a post of its own for reasons even non-gamers may find personally relevant.
Why non-gamers should care: see future post

Halo 3 – If you don’t know what Halo is, I’m not going to be able to get you any more excited. For those of you who do know what I’m talking about: Bungie has produced the first teaser trailer for the final (yes, I said final) installment of the Halo series. The launch date has been revised from “probably in the future” to “2007.” That’s not very specific, but considering the studio was not willing to admit they were even working on the game until E3, it’s a good deal more specific than it has been.
Why non-gamers should care: The guys will be playing something new at beachweek next year.

World of Warcraft – The expansion race has been declared. I’m excited. People who are interested in the expansion pack are excited (and given WoW’s tremendous popularity, that’s a pretty big group), but that has very little relevance for non-gamers.
Why non-gamers should care: They probably shouldn’t care about that. But what might affect them are Blizzard’s plans to make a movie out of this universe. Non-gamers you may have to put up with that in the not too distant future (although they’re using the same studio that created Batman Begins, so here’s hoping they produce a piece of similar excellence).

PS3 – The 3^rd generation of Playstation is going to cost way more than I’m willing to pay. While it’s not GOOD news, per se. It’s still relevant to me. One less console on my shelf.
Why non-gamers should care: this is not just a part of the console-wars, it’s also going to play a role in deciding the primary format for our next generation of DVD-players. Sony is using the PS3 as a way to get their chosen format (Blu-ray) out into the wild. In fact, the inclusion of a Blu-ray player in the PS3 is the very reason for the high price. This will affect you eventually in much the same way the betamax-VHS battles did.

There are, of course, many other announcements, booths, and exhibits going on throughout E3. Sony, Microsoft, and Nintendo are just the current industry giants – the 800 pound gorillas.

If you have any interest in videogames, take a look at some of the links. I you don’t, well, wait a week and I’ll talk about something else.

How about cooking? I’ll talk about that. (Did you know the Wii is going to have a cooking game? You use the motion-controller to cut vegetables, sautee the. . .)

THE DORK STAMP

First, I think I have to start by defining the word "dork." My parents read this blog and, well, as I learned when I affectionately called my mother a dork, it had a very different meaning when they were growing up than it does now.

A dork is someone very like a nerd or a geek. What they share is a certain amount of social awkwardness and an interest in technical subjects. Dorks don't necessarily have the same proficiency as a geek or intelligence as a nerd, just the tendency to get far too excited about uncool topics (if that doesn't make sense now, it will in a moment). In my own personal use (and I hope that of my friends), it's an endearing term, dorks being considered essentially good-hearted but not quite with it. I'm starting to realize that this benevolent view of dorks is more prominent among engineers than other groups, but since I tend to run with engineers (word to my homies) that's okay with me.

My girlfriend will occasionally smack my forehead (gently) and tell me I've earned my dork stamp - the suggestion being that she is marking the word "dork" in a prominent place so others will be warned. As if a sign were really necessary... I said "occasionally" above, but what I meant was "almost daily." The only reason it's not more often is that she has a high tolerance for goofiness (she'd kind of have to, wouldn't she?).

It's certainly a stamp I've earned, although it would probably be more efficient to just get the tattoo. Before you nod your heads and laugh at me, I should remind you, dear readers, that I've had your help for many of my more egregious offenses.

For those of you still feigning ignorance (and the entertainment of those who were not there), allow me to provide a few examples (with the appropriate nod to Jeff Foxworthy).

If you have ever made a joke about Discrete Math or Conic Sections... you might be a dork.

If you have ever repeated to another person your roommate's joke about Discrete Math or Conic sections ... you might be a dork.

If you count on your fingers ... in binary ... you might be a dork.

If you have camped out overnight for the opening of a) a new game system b) a Star Wars movie or c) a Lord of the Rings movie ... you might be a dork.

If you have ever participated in the making of an amateur film about Jedi... you might be a dork.

If the phrase "Imperial Troops sack Rome" in a history book brings to mind the image of Darth Vader and his stormtroopers running amuck through the Coliseum ... and you TOLD someone about this ... you might be a dork.

If you have ever edited a computer game so the characters look like your friends and speak with their voices ... you might be a dork.

If you have ever dressed up for halloween as a character from your favorite movie ... and no one recognized you ... you might be a dork.

If you have ever dressed up for halloween as a character from your favorite BOOK ... you might be a dork.

I think that covers just about everyone who reads this except my parents, and I will not make the mistake of calling them dorks again - I will say this, though, the apple does not fall far from the tree ;-)

OF MICE AND RABBITS

I haven't mentioned books in a while. It’s time to do so again. I came across two the other day that I did not mention in my earlier posts. I should have.

Both books are about talking animals and in that sense, both books are technically fantasy. One has swords, heroes, and other trappings of your more traditional fantasy (no dragons, but it does have a dragon substitute). The other book has no swords, but it does have an exodus of epic proportions.

The two books are:
Redwall, by Brian Jacques
Watership Down, by Richard Adams

The two books have many similarities and yet produce remarkably different stories.

REDWALL

Redwall is the tale of an abbey of peaceful woodland creatures (mice, squirrels, moles, and even a badger) who must defend themselves from an army of rats, stoats, and weasels.

That’s the traditional fantasy tale – young hero must fulfill the prophecy to save his loved ones. If you have issues with traditional fantasy or talking animals, you should probably skip this one. If you have no firm objections to such things, you should definitely read Redwall. This was the first full sized novel I read when I was young (300 pages!) and I loved it. The heroes are noble, the villains are dastardly, and the story is engaging. Like other books I have mentioned this one may be more enjoyable at age 7 than age 27, but I still love reading it.

If you enjoy it, you’ll be pleased to hear it’s the beginning of a long series of books set in the same world. Each book is a complete story unto itself (but do read them in order). Eventually they begin to suffer from the same defects the plague any world which lasts too long under the exclusive control of a single author (one of those things I should probably devote an entire entry to someday), but the early books are excellent.

WATERSHIP DOWN

The other book I’m discussing today has a very different tone. Watership Down is the first book I ever purchased. I bought it at a yard sale on someone else’s recommendation and then did not read it. When I finally got around to it, I kicked myself for waiting.

It is the tale of a group of rabbits fleeing the destruction of their home, seeking a new place to live. The English countryside is not a safe place for rabbits and they have a long ways to travel.

It is complex and well-told with a good deal more depth than one might expect from a tale about talking rabbits. It’s the kind of story in which the reader finds something new every time they read it. It has not lost anything, and indeed has gained much, as I have aged to appreciate its depth. I recommend this book for all ages (okay, so the five year olds might not be interested… so not ALL ages, but most of them).

Seek out these books – Watership Down for a rainy day when you want to sink your teeth into a solid story and Redwall for the warm summer evenings when you want something that feels like a warm summer evening.

And feel free to let me know what you think after you’ve had a chance to read them. The more feedback you give me, the easier it will be for me to make appropriate recommendations.

ALL IN A NAME

Nintendo recently announced the official name of their next generation of console. Up to this point, it has been known as “The Revolution.” That, however, was a codename only., a placeholder until they came up with the real name. That real name is “The Wii” (pronounced “we”).

As you might have guessed, this name has caused a lot of discussion and more than a little name calling. Actually, the word “discussions” implies civility, which is a concept the internet struggles with. So in the interest of keeping this PG, and not exposing my poor readers to language that would challenge a pirate, I’ll restrict my links to those few pockets of the internet that DO practice civility. Here’s someone who hates the name “Wii.” Here is someone who does not hate the name “Wii” (finding someone who admits to liking it is a little harder). Thanks to Slashdot for pointing me to these in the first place.

The official announcement, which I recommend you take a look at, shows a flash animation and is accompanied by text that describes what the name means.

One of the negative responses to that intro (which appears on the page I linked above) claims “anytime a company starts explaining their brand name, it’s a bad sign.” Other naysayers have similar comments.

Eh, that’s an easy argument to make, and it sounds good, but meaning that must be explained should not be so easily dismissed.

I should probably pause here and admit that I have no marketing experience or training so I’m not “professionally” qualified to comment on this. Fortunately for me, this is the internet and those sorts of “credentials” are not required here.

Nintendo is trying to turn Wii into a symbol, to use a simple form to express a complex concept. Unfortunately for them there is no symbol for "innovative social games that even nongamers will enjoy using a totally new kind of controller and please do not think of this in the same category as any other game system this is something completely different" which is what they are trying to convey. So they had to make their own symbol: The Wii. In order for a new symbol to become a symbol, it has to first be explained. How many people could have told you Nike was the Greek goddess of victory BEFORE the sneakers came out?

It’s kind of a hard name to like at first glance. It is, however, the name. No matter how much the internet whines, this machine IS going to be called The Wii. And Nintendo has its reasons, many of which they have told us (including the fact that it’s a name both Americans and Japanese can pronounce). I’m okay with those reasons. Eventually, I’m pretty sure the name won’t sound strange anymore. The system, from what I’ve heard so far, has enough appeal for me that I plan to get one no matter what they call it.

[Note: The actual announcement was the last week in April. This entry was added later and backdated – see 5/16 entry for the reasons]

APRIL IN DC

DC has a pretty weak Winter, I've discussed this already. DC Summer is infamous for being muggy and unpleasant. It's no Houston, but it's no picnic either. The Fall is pretty good, but as with the Winter, growing up with the New England version makes it pretty hard to get excited about anything else.

Spring, however, well DC wins that one hands down. In terms of the weather, Spring is one of the few times DC is ever truly comfortable without mechanical assistance (the other being Fall). The days are warm and the nights are cool. It is an encouraging time to be outdoors.

The city itself seems designed with this in mind. Certainly, the current City Architect takes full advantage of the strength of a good DC Spring. There are flowers and flowering plants everywhere. Daffodils (my personal favorite), tulips, and pansies (there are plenty more, but that's close to the limit of my ability to identify particular species) are planted almost everywhere people can be convinced not to walk. Those are just the general flower beds. There are entire public gardens devoted to showing off different species of flowers.

Don't like flowers? There are sculpture gardens (at least two that I know of), memorials (of course), bike paths, hiking trails (yes, there is indeed a small forest in the middle of DC, it even has deer), picnic locations, ballparks, volley ball courts, sailing marinas, canoeing/kayak launches (yes, also in the middle of DC), and so on. You name a reason to be outdoors and DC probably has it (well, they do kind of frown on hunting).

Yes, DC shines in Spring.

And to kick it all off, they throw the Cherry Blossom Festival. This year, thanks to the wimpier-than-usual Winter, the festival started in March. My girlfriend and I went last Thursday, the day predicted to be the peak blooming day (although that was coincidence, we had been planning on going that day before we learned about that). On the list of good things I can say about my shift schedule, the top item is definitely the random weekdays off that allow us to go places and do things while everyone else is working (makes shopping easier, too). It made this year's trip to the festival much less crowded than last year's weekend excursion.

DC still has a long way to go before I forgive it for ruining all my snowboarding plans but the Cherry Blossom Festival is a good start.

ALL IN A NIGHT'S WORK

I work three different shifts on a rotating basis, roughly a week of each. We refer to them as Days (6am to 2pm), Swings (2pm to 10pm) and Mids (10pm to 6am). Just to make things a little more complicated we occasionally throw in twelve hour shifts on weekends. So which shift do people like the least? Generally Day shift. Honestly.

They all have pluses and minuses. Swing shift definitely makes it difficult to socialize outside of work (after college it’s very difficult to get together with friends on a week night when you can’t start until 10:30). In terms of my body’s sleep clock, however, there’s no more pleasant shift. I go to sleep when I get tired, wake up when I want to, and go to work somewhere in the middle. It’s hard to get anything useful done on such a schedule, but I certainly do feel refreshed.

Day shift, however is absolutely brutal on my sleep and this is largely the reason I dread it. I have to get up at 4:30 am and SHOULD be in bed by 8:30 pm. The former is jarring and vicious, largely because the latter simply does not happen. I tend to spend Day shift with a sleep deficit that just gets worse as the week progresses.

Mids has its own sleep complications, of course. Sleeping during the day is not an easy thing – especially if your downstairs neighbor is trying to learn the trombone and your next-door neighbor plays the guitar. My girlfriend has it worse. She lives above a puppy that does not like being left alone during the day, next to a four year old who does not seem to like anything, and across the street from a parking garage that, if the alarms are any indication, must be the crime capital of the world. Also when the neighbor with the puppy IS home, he throws loud parties just to show off his subwoofer. My girlfriend sleeps with earplugs.

Besides that, however, there are lots of reasons to enjoy Mids:

Atmosphere: There’s a certain other worldly feel to being awake while everyone else is asleep. Everything is emptier, the pace is slower, and the atmosphere is more relaxed.

Clothing: Jeans and a t-shirt. Also sneakers. Ahhhhh.

MidsFeast: Saturday night we hold a massive potluck dinner. We select a theme and everyone brings a dish. The food tends to last all night long. Glorious. Fattening, but glorious.

Fiona Ritchie: She’s the host of “Thistle” on NPR – an hour of Scottish and Irish music. I’m not entirely sure what a “brogue” is, but if I were to use it in a sentence that sentence would describe Fiona Ritchie’s voice. It would probably also contain the word “lilting” and it might mention that I am a sucker for a Scottish accent (which is not too surprising, considering how many of my father’s ancestors were Scottish and Welsh). Also, I love the music. My Sunday evening commute never fails to leave me in a happy mood (which is good, because the return trip occurs in Monday morning traffic after twelve hours of work).

BITS AND PIECES
::A Few of the "Thoughts " that have Occurred to Me Recently (but which are not fully fleshed ideas worthy of an entire post)::

Traveling - I feel sorry for the security officer who had to search my bag on the way back from Denver. It is ostensibly a snowboard bag, but I stuff it full of everything it will take. This serves two purposes: 1) it protects my board from rough handling and 2) it makes it much easier for me to stick to the "two checked bags" rule. This means that the person who searched my bag (and left that helpful little note to tell me that this had happened) had to go through not just a snowboard, but the boots, jacket, snowpants, sneakers, slippers, helmet, goggles, scarf, face mask, socks, pants (two pairs), ice skates (my girlfriend's), boot warmers, camelbak, gloves, long johns, overshirt (two), sweater, and the knee-brace I brought just in case (never used, I wrenched my ankle, not my knee) - all of which were tightly rolled, packed, stuffed, and arranged like pieces in a puzzle to get the most use of a small space. Poor guy. He got his revenge, though, my bags returned two days after I did.

Bodily Functions - The average person farts fourteen times a day. Why do I know this? Because I learned it in the seventh grade when such information was vitally important to me. Apparently it stuck with me. Why did it occur to me now? Because I attended Dave's 4th Annual SXSW Chili Cookoff last night. Good food, good times.

Don't Take Yourself Too Seriously - I think one of the most important attributes a person can have is the ability to not take themselves too seriously. I also think that the best way to get people to listen to you is not to sound Important but to sound Interesting - these are two different things (related, but not identical). It's easy to say things that are important and which should be interesting, it's not as easy to convince other people that they are. This is where a little bit of humor can help. On that note, our pilot for the return from Chicago to Dulles earned high marks (and our continued attention) for making the following announcement: "Once the seatbelt sign is turned off you will be free to move about the cabin, although we recommend that you remain inside the aircraft at all times."

Endurance and Obstinacy - The last day of our ski trip the temperature hovered in the single digits with a windchill that was in the negative double-digits (around -30 to be more precise). Rather than stop skiing, we bought hand and toe warmers and went on with our day. Those temperatures would kill a naked man pretty quickly. Yet we stayed out in it because we were having too much fun to go inside. Clothing technology (with some assistance from the warmers) has reached a point where we could stay outside in such weather with very little impact to our mobility and not because we NEED to be out in such weather but because we wanted to have fun. Amazing. If recreational skiing isn't a sign our culture appreciates luxury, I do not know what is.

Congratulations - To Bruce and Colleen. If you don't know why, ask them.

ON SECOND THOUGHT, MAYBE I'D BETTER START WITH THE BAR

This Tuesday, after what amounts to five years of procrastination, I went to the gym.

I think part of the reason I waited so long is that on some level, I did not really believe I needed to go. In high school and college I hit a level of fitness I was pretty happy with and never felt the need to bulk up further. I had a six pack. I could run and swim long distances. I could lift heavy objects and hold them for long periods of time. I was proud of my ability to surprise people by doing so. That's all I wanted. Okay, that's not true, I wanted to attract women, but I settled for taking pride in myself (which, as it turns out is in itself an attractive feature).

After I left college, I worked on a construction site and grew even more fit carrying all sorts of equipment up and down four stories worth of ladders and, later, twelve flights worth of stairs. Then I got a desk job, but I think I refused to acknowledge what that might do to my general health (I also started drinking soda to stay awake at my desk job and that probably did not help either). Despite mounting evidence to the contrary, I still didn't really believe I needed to work out. I was pretty sure I still had my six pack (I just figured it was, you know, covered). In the back of my mind I've always felt that I could just walk into a gym and pick up where I left off and so felt no sense of urgency about doing so. There's also a good chance that, deeper down, I had no desire to actually test this theory.

Well, I went and tested it Tuesday. See, I'm going on a long hike (no, Dave, my version of a long hike) with my family in the Summer and I don't want to embarass myself in front of them. My brother, as part of our preparation for this hike, has convinced me to sign up for a triathlon in May and I don't want to embarass myself in front of all those strangers. Also, my girlfriend has started going to the gym and I really don't want to embarass myself in front of her. So Tuesday I went with her.

As it turns out I don't have that six pack anymore. It's not cleverly concealed, it's gone. Nor can I just start where I left off. It was a painful discovery, both mentally and physically. I was smart enough not to actually try the weights I used to do, but I may have underestimated my decline. I have always considered myself fit and now I have proof that I'm not. Not at the moment, at least. Well, it's time to change things.

I went back on Wednesday.

BLUE SKY REDEMPTION

Some time ago, when I was applying for my first job, an interviewer asked me the following question: "Completely blue sky, that is ignoring any monetary or technical constraints, describe for me the perfect shower controls." Up until then, things had been going very well. It took me a long time to realize exactly how badly I screwed up the answer to this question. The only way I could have made more certain that I did not get the job would have been to mention the interviewer's daughter in my answer.

The short version of what I did wrong? I forgot about the "blue sky" part of the question. You're not getting the long version, I don't want to talk about it. As someone who prides himself on creativity and intelligence, I'm still intensely embarrased at my incredible failure to use either of those traits to answer the question.

Since the day I realized what I had done, I have spent some time thinking about how to properly answer such a question. For lack of anything better to do today, I'm going to share some of these thoughts with you.

First, one must consider: what is the ultimate purpose of a shower? If you do not understand what people intend to get out of the experience, you will not be able to give them the means to get it. So, what DO people want from a shower?

Well, to get clean, for one. Well if that's the case (and I'm going to argue in a moment that it's not the only case), and we take "without constraints" to mean "without constraints" why do we even need the shower, let alone the controls? Why not assume a device that is capable of cleaning a person in a much less intrusive and less time intensive manner? Assume, instead, we could build a device into a doorframe that automatically (and unobtrusively) removes dirt and oils from you and your clothes every time you walk through it; or assume a piece of jewelry that acts to prevent you from ever getting dirty in the first place. Think of all the time such a device would save. Think about how inconvenient the shower-as-cleaning-device really is and get rid of it. In other words, if we're assuming our point is cleanliness and we have a blue sky to do it in, we're assuming a world that doesn't bother with showers.

But... if we take a closer look, cleaning ourselves isn't really the only use we have for showers. Humans, as I'm fond of pointing out, have never limited themselves to using a thing solely for its original purpose (some would argue that this tendency is exactly what makes us human). Some people instead use showers to warm up on a cold day, to cool off after a hard workout. Some people use them to wake up (slowly or suddenly). Some people simply enjoy the sensation of standing beneath a stream of water (with or without company). In other words, besides cleanliness, we also simply enjoy the feel of a shower and will use one for that purpose alone.

A tiny device, in a blue sky world, might be capable of providing the same sensations without the extra room or, say, the skin drying effects, but even so, controls would be required.

Now that I've demonstrated that I really can think "blue sky," I'll get around to answering the actual question. Not that the previous discussion was useless, it serves to point us towards the purpose of showers (or the simulation thereof) in a "blue sky" world: sensation.

Actually, I'm not going to get around to that question quite yet. After we figure out WHY we're controlling a thing, we need to understand WHAT we can control about it. What dimensions exist within the context of the shower that we would wish to have under our control?

Your typical shower today gives you control over temperature and flow (although these are not usually independent). Some shower heads then give you further control over the
force of the water, the shape, and the output pattern (massaging or steady) - again, not usually independent. The shower-head-on-a-hose attachment, although not often considered a control does act as onel; it is a means of controlling the direction of water flow. What else is there we could control about the shower? How about the size of the droplets? If we really have complete control, we could provide a full range from atomized mist to a solid stream (my personal favorite).

Here, then, is a quick list of the various factors we might possibly wish to control if it was in our power to do so (and keeping in mind that sensation is our goal): water temperature, water volume, water pressure, pressure pattern over time, droplet size, direction, coverage, air temperature (yes, air temperature - ever stepped from a warm shower into a cold bathroom? Then you know why you might want to integrate air temperature into shower controls). I'm sure there are others.

That's a lot for one person to worry about. In a pure "blue sky" world, however, the user shouldn't have to worry at all. The shower would be able to read the user's neurological activity and manipulate the environment from there. Step into the shower, think to yourself "today I feel like a warm, misty kind of shower" and it will take care of itself. Too warm? The shower will adjust based on your preferred comfort level (keeping in mind that some people prefer showers to be just short of painful). There would need to be some indication for first time users that this is how the shower operates or they will spend a long time looking for a knob before they step in. Although such a notification would become less and less necessary as such a shower gained wider adoptance.

On top of the mind reading, designers would probably also want to install an emergency cutoff just in case something malfunctioned (assuming everything will always work as planned is a quick and easy way to get into serious trouble - even in a blue sky world). Such a cutoff would have to be easy to find with your eyes closed, reachable from a prone position (in case of a fall), and not blocked by the source of water.

Now if mind reading is a little too-blue-bordering-on-the-black-of-space, there are other options. Voice control would be my next choice (assuming, of course, that this blue sky world has technology that can handle conversational style voice commands in such an accoustically hostile environment), namely because it's incredibly versatile, and fits all the requirements listed above for the emergency cut off: accessible with water in your eyes, accessible in case of accident, and not blocked by the source of water (to be safe, you'd probably still want a physical cut off option). The only thing it does not do, that mind reading would not require, is remind the user what adjustments are actually possible. If it never occurs to the user that they can adjust the droplet size, they will never make an attempt to do so. One way to address that concern would be a list of features that displays when you first perpare for the shower (and which can be told not to after you've owned the shower long enough) and could be redisplayed (or spoken out loud) during the shower at the user's request.

There are plenty of other considerations such as individual defaults ("Hey shower, it's Bob, I think I'd like my 'Workout Cooldown' preset this time.") and additional non-shower-specific features ("Turn the radio on to DC 101, and remind me I've been in here too long after about ten minutes."). Physical controls, or even reduced functionality voice controls (that is, predefined instead of conversational), would be a whole new issue but this post is already long enough. I think you get the picture.

Next time I get a blue sky question, I'll do better (it would be hard not to).